“It’s a tangled web I weave”  This phrase I would attribute to my single life more often than not. This simple phrase sums up the idea that dating, however you want to define it, is confusing and exhilarating, complicated and a down right pain in the ass most of the time. Because when you are single and trying to figure it all out what is the one thing you want to do???? Yep… keep your options open.

Keeping your options open… aka whoever you shall meet is a potential option regardless of who has already become an option. Now, don’t get confused! Everyone of your options need to be kept at a distance otherwise you risk hurting feelings. Or is it just me?! Do I find the guys that don’t understand the simplistic idea of dating and just have to dive right in to loving me even though its more than obvious I am not looking for love? And please do not misunderstand me, I have never considered myself to be the catch of all! I like myself, I think I am fun and easy going and I know how to care for people. But at the end of the day I always seem to find the guys who want it all and can’t wait.

Keeping your options at a distance also protects yourself because some guys will leave on their own accord and you don’t need to let yourself hurt over a guy who was barely a part of your life. It also protects you from any potential dick bag losers who have snuck their way into being an option. So, when the true colors shine and you realize there is no chance in hell this guy has a shot with you, you can remove him without the heartache. (Sounds a bit heartless at this point doesn’t it? Yea well… )

Heartless, another word that gets tossed around while I’m dating. Mostly because I do not invest myself in others. Blame it on being burned I guess, or a deep rooted feeling that maybe I have invested all of my emotion in the past and just never really go it back. And I am sorry to anyone I meet, but I really have nothing for idle behavior. You want my heart, win it.

And there is the clincher! The reason why dating is such an epic pain in the ass! Tell me ladies, (single anyways) when is the last time you have had a guy really wow you?? Guys want our love and our devotion and undivided attention but please tell me what they are doing these days to try and get that? And when they don’t get it… heartless, bitch, bitter, cynical… I have heard them all! But I’m sorry, I refuse to give you what you want because you think you deserve it. You don’t deserve anything from me just like I deserve nothing from you! But if you want this to go anywhere than please for the love of females everywhere WOW ME!

Until then, until some man (notice… I said MAN) comes along and puts in as much effort as I would, I will keep on dating, weaving the tangled web and keeping this heart of mine on lock down.


  1. Hey there,
    You’re entry reminds me of a blog entry that I read a while ago. I’d share the link but its no longer available, alas. I wish I would have printed it out because its on my mind a lot these days. Basically, the writer said that every guy she dates she asks, “what can you bring to the table?” She’s a successful single parent owning her own home, financially secure, active, outgoing and generally loving her independent life. She doesn’t need a guy in her world so they need to be able to bring something. As a single parent I have no idea how I can WOW someone, what new thing I can bring to the table… I think most independent women feel the way you do. I’m not saying you should settle, I’m just letting you know it seems you’re not alone. As a (thoughtful) guy it’s intimidating in this new reality. I wish I had the short man’s ego and thought I was god’s gift to womankind but alas, I’m just a average guy. Wishing you luck… B


  2. Where to start on this….This is an epic circle the male and female will always struggle with. Before I get started with this reply let me remind all that might read this and either agree and or get offended, these are my thoughts, my emotions, directly formed from my own expeirences. These words are not meant to hurt anyone, but if you are it is possible could be about you.

    Lets get started with the WOW factor. First there are very few ladies in the area even open to the WOW factor. The ladies in this area are on lock down so tight, that when you approach them in public, it is a disaster. Ladies out in the public wearing three inch heels and short skirts tells me one thing. ” Approach Me” . So when the opportunity arises and the approach is made, no matter how witty or funny the opening comment is, the male is an instant DB. Why might I ask, could it be because you are on lock down. Open up is what I am saying, let go ladies, let a guy come up to you and ‘ WOW” you as you will. One night cant hurt. No harm no fowl for a great night. Leave it there. No numbers exchange needed, just have fun. Second I have not been honest with my feelings in the past, and find myself loving then realizing three months later, OMG what have I done. This goes both ways ladies. I finsd as I walk through this endless journey of looking for love that love is right there every day. It might be ten minutes, or ten years, but I can say I have loved every girl. Second on the WOW factor, why is it up to the guy to WOW you. Every girl that spends ten minutes with me is WOW’d . Then I find myself in your situation with every girl wanting love, when I was just trying to show a lady a great time. So no I am on the I am not WOW ing any girl any more, I try to see if she likes the four month from now me. Than plan seems to be an epic fail. So where does this leave us in the battle of the sexes?


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