When is being available, being “too available”? This is a question that has sparked some conversation for my group of friends recently. A few of us are dating, some are single, some are taken. Let me tell you how awesome conversations can become with a group as eclectic as us! Different ages, different backgrounds, multitude of upbringings. But the conversations that bring us together always stem around the way we date, love and mourn. We are each others anchors and I wouldn’t trade my ladies for anything.
MOVING ON…
In the dating world, is it possible to come off as “too available”? Is being too eager to see someone really that much of a turn off? Does it seem desperate when a girl has a lot of free time and says yes to every invite? Do we need to play the game and turn you down sometimes even if our schedule is in fact completely wide open? This is our topic of most recent discussion.
I have been told I am too aloof and unavailable in the past, with a busy schedule and not much willingness to deviate from planned events, I can be hard to schedule time with. I have had guys during the initial date stages walk away and tell me it’s because I didn’t have time for them, they didn’t want to fight my hobbies for time with me. IS THIS REAL LIFE?? A friend of mine was told she was “too available” He was turned off by the fact she was always able and willing to hang out, made her seem clingy and desperate. IS THIS REAL LIFE??
Do women seriously need to expend brain power on trying to figure out the correct balance of availability in dating? Why can’t we just say yes when we are free and no when we are not and not worry about the ridicule of specificity behind the invite and our response?! AND if you are truly interested, shouldn’t you be excited when I am available for you? Or willing to stick it out for me to make time for you?
When is being available considered being “too available”?
Reblogged this on Alice's Adventures in Datingland and commented:
See, this is exactly what I mean. I am too available therefore come across as desperate.
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Thanks for the re-blog!! We all struggle with this bullshit!
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Reblogged this on Cafecito for the soul and commented:
Dating jungle surviving tip:
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Thanks for the re-blog Cafecito! It is a jungle out there!
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It’s confusing. If someone asks me to hang out and I’m free, I’ll go, but when I am first seeing someone I leave it to them to ask me.
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Absolutely. A girl who has hew own life and hobbies is extremely attractive. A girl who doesn’t and is readily available for everything and anything shows she may be lacking a world of her own, which can be perceived as clingy or needy.
It’s really a nice balance. I like it when a girl makes time for me in her schedule, but I don’t want to be the only thing scheduled surrounded by massive tracks of space and less important things.
Keep up the good writing. =)
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You have a valid point!
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I struggle with exactly the same thing all the time – if you find the answer let me know!
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Yep! Will do! But always remember, just do you!
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This is right on the tee. There are so many rules about what and what not to do, and how we should come across. Its exhausting!
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Exactly! Keep fighting the good fight!
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Great Post! Why make things complicated when all you want is simplicity.
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Agreed!! Thanks for the comment!
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